What to do when life throws everything at you

You know how the saying goes “when life gives you lemons, make lemonade.” It’s meant to encourage a positive attitude in times of hardship. The problem is sometimes life piles everything on top of you and that positive attitude just keeps on getting knocked down. So how can you go about making lemonade when life is tough?

We all go through those times where it just seems like it’s one bad thing happening after another. That was 2018 for me, it was a year filled with some of the hardest things I’ve ever had to deal with and it’s a year that I still have difficulty looking back on sometime later. I’m not going to lie and say that last year didn’t change or effect me because it did massively. I’m still left with a little bit of lingering dread that everything will crumble again but things do get better over time and here’s what I believe works when you’re dealing with everything life could possibly throw at you.

In certain situations this one can be hard and it’s O.K. to panic initially. Once you’ve calmed down though the best thing you can do is to be practical and calm. Worrying and stressing never resolves anything and it will only make you feel worse. If things have happened that are out of your control it is best to accept that sometimes shit happens and there is nothing you can do about it. If it’s a situation you can resolve, being calm will get you to a solution quicker. Trust me I know this is all easier said than done because I am the worlds biggest worrier and stresser but it really doesn’t make any situation better. There were things that happened last year that left me in sheer panic that I couldn’t see a way out of because all the anxiety was clouding any rational thinking. Once I’d calmed down though and accepted that although the situation was pretty bad, there were ways to work through it. Things can’t always be resolved but honestly things will always get better.

When everything is seemingly falling apart around you, all your energy goes into trying to build those things back up, it’s a natural response. By doing this though you’re running the risk of burning out really quick. Finding a fix and having a plan is great but make sure you still take care of yourself. Burning out to the point of illness just sets you back and ultimately makes you feel worse. Make sure you’re setting time aside to truly relax and look after yourself properly. In the darkest times it’s easy to think that if you take some time off for yourself that everything will just crumble again but it won’t. I was ill a lot last year and most of it came from the stress and worry of the situations we found ourselves in throughout the year. So take it from me that self care is still important.

Have a good cry if you need it. Don’t keep everything bottled up inside. Crying has actually been proven to be a stress reliever and to lower blood pressure so in stressful situations it really is best to let it all out. Hiding your emotions and keeping things to yourself doesn’t make you any better equipped to deal with situations because you will continue to carry all of those negative feelings around with you. Letting it all out will allow you to be calmer quicker and move on faster.

Talk to anyone, friends, family, a professional, even your pets if it helps! There is no shame in asking for help, you are not made to deal with absolutely everything on your own and there’s certainly no shame at all in seeking professional help if you want it. In an age where we are quite happy to share a lot of things on social media we seem to still have a real problem with talking about more serious issues and our worries. Talking things through has been proven to make people feel better about their situation, a sense of relief comes from opening up and you never know someone might just be on hand with some help and advice to see you through.

Thinking rationally is essential for coming up with a plan. There are always ways around things and having a plan of action will help you see a way out of the dark times. Just as an example if you have money worries take a long hard look at all of your outgoings and formulate a plan for temporarily living on a strict budget. If it’s job stress think of all the ways you can make the situation better, plan for applying for jobs, think of any side hustles you could start. As I said some things you just have to accept are out of your hands but nearly all situations can be improved with a good plan in place.

The turning point for me last year was when I decided to stop fretting about the bad stuff and just enjoy the good stuff. It was November and with my favourite time of the year approaching there was no way I was going to let anything spoil that for me. Find enjoyment in everything and your mind will be taken off everything else and gradually your focus will shift to the happier moments rather than the sad moments.

Do you have any tips on how to deal with going through a hard time? Leave a comment below!

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